always stand by you

The past few months have been a rather difficult season in my life. It's been a time of discovering exactly who my true friends are... and it has had many surprising and painful results. And I admit, I've been wallowing a bit -- feeling sorry for ourselves comes so naturally, doesn' it? -- and moping that life isn't going my way and no one understands what I'm going through. I've tried talking to friends and coworkers in my usual way of sorting out my thoughts and feelings through lots and lots of words (verbal or written!), but it's not helping.

Well, as another timely reminder from the Lord this week (I love it when He does that!), the song "I Will Always Stand By You" by The Violet Burning just popped up on my iTunes shuffle. I frequently listen to music at work, just to fill the background of an otherwise monotonous, cubicle-clad day, and most of the time don't even pay attention to what's on. But when this song began, it was like the lyrics were being shouted in my ears:

Well I know, 'cause I've been there, too.

I instantly had a mental picture of the Garden of Gethsemane, when Jesus, too, had a moment of finding out exactly who His true friends were. He knows exactly what it feels like when someone you cared for and thought you knew turns their back on you and rejects you. The song continues:

I will always stand by you
I will always love you
So cry out to me
And I will run to thee
When the night comes down around you

I was instantly chastised. He is the one I need to turn to, vent to, pour out all of my words and thoughts and feelings to, because He is the Only One who truly loves, truly understands. And He doesn't just sit around waiting for me to turn to Him. He is not a passive listener. No, He runs to meet me!

Like the little child who wanders away from her parents at the playground, insisting she is enough of a "big girl" to play on the swings all on her own, I have tried to manage this challenging season of my life all by myself. And like that same little girl who inevitably falls off the swing and begins to cry, I've hit the ground and been hurt. And like the parent who instantly recognizes his child's cry and rushes to her aid, Jesus runs to find me, to meet me right where I'm at, to pick me up in His strong arms and comfort and heal me.

psalm 56

Every day I receive a devotional email from my beloved congregation back in Scotland. These "Lifelines" are always poignant and comforting, and it never ceases to amaze me how just the right one always arrives exactly when I need it. Today, it was Psalm 56:

Be merciful to me, O God, for men hotly pursue me;
all day long they press their attack.
My slanderers pursue me all day long;
many are attacking me in their pride.
When I am afraid,
I will trust in You.
In God, whose word I praise,
in God I trust; I will not be afraid.
What can mortal man do to me?
All day long they twist my words;
they are always plotting to harm me.
They conspire, they lurk,
they watch my steps,
eager to take my life.
On no account let them escape;
in your anger, O God, bring down the nations.
Record my lament;
list my tears on your scroll -
are they not in your record?
Then my enemies will turn back
when I call for help.
By this I will know that God is for me.
In God, whose word I praise,
in the LORD, whose word I praise -
in God I trust; I will not be afraid.
What can man do to me?
I am under vows to you, O God;
I will present my thank offerings to you.
For you have delivered me from death
and my feet from stumbling,
that I may walk before God
in the light of life.
(ESV)


"This Psalm refers to an event in David's life when he was drifting away from the Lord and pretending to be mad in order to escape from the Philistines (1 Samuel 21:10-15). The Lord sometimes lets us get into difficulties in order to bring us back to Himself. It certainly worked with David as this Psalm proves.

"The great sin in the human heart is pride and when people attack us or get angry with us it is often because their personal pride demands them to do so. Opposition of any kind can fill us with fear and foreboding. However, we are told here how to get rid of our fears. We are to trust in the Lord. Whatever people may do to us - and godly people down the ages have suffered vicious persecution and martyrdom - we need not be afraid of them as long as we put our whole trust in the loving God.

"In vv 7-8 David is not necessarily being vengeful but is calling on the Lord to bring evil people to judgment. God's Word tells us not to keep a record of evil. Yet we can be sure that the Lord keeps a record of every tear we shed. That is the measure of His love for us. If we trust Him, we will be given proof of His love for us because He answers our prayers.

"David reminds himself of the commitment he made to the Lord and that he was under a solemn covenant to live for the Lord. We are not very good at keeping the promises we make to the Lord. When we realize that He has delivered from whatever trouble we are facing, we need reminding that He has done this so that we 'may walk before God in the light of life.' When our daily lives are flooded with the light of life in God it goes a long way to banish our fears."